The Shore and The Sea (a poem)

Artist: Jake Fernandez 

Part 1: The Shore 

Standing on the shore of who You are

I don't even know how I got here

I see a wave

For the first time

I let the water touch my toes

Internally, I'm ruined

The knowledge

The truth
The love 

In that little touch of water

Is almost too much to withstand

The beat of my heart is savage

It scares me 

Longing for more
I confuse the ache for misery

So I do what I always do 
When feelings overwhelm me 
I run
As fast as I can back to dry sand

Breathless, I collapse

Deep breaths in
Slow breaths out 
Idly, I sift sand through my fingers  
As I wait for my disobedient lungs
To surrender and steady 

By then the water on my feet is dry

Oceanic residue remains 

Enough to transform

But there is too much of me underneath 

I have always been content on the sand

Making sandcastles, smiling at sunbathers 

Watching others jump in the water

But when I became curious

When I walked to the shoreline

And the water touched my toes

I knew

Even as I ran away from it

I knew

I must run toward it

I rise 

I quit thinking and 

Feel

The sun on my face

Drying the water from before

Leaving a film that itches 
And makes me crave

More of the water

I quit thinking and

Hear

The waves calling to me

Reminding me the water is still there

The birds of the air 
Sing a song that proclaims

Even we are not forgotten

I quit thinking and 

Smell

The salty air

Yes, even the air carries

The aroma of the water

Part 2: The Run

Suddenly I begin to run

Instinctively I know 
I cannot ease into this water

I must run and jump

There is no stepping in
Getting adjusted

Then moving in a little more

And a little more

And a little more 

Because I may stop moving

When I feel I am deep enough

There is no deep enough

I'm running

My legs are doing 

What my mind cannot

And I laugh

Not caring as the shells bite into my feet

Blood trails behind me on the sand
Coastland clues create a pathway of pain 
For others to follow

The running releases something within me

Adrenaline surges through my veins 
Suddenly I can't reach the water fast enough

I scream in agonizing anticipation 

Face flushed and hot

I'm scared I'll fall before I reach it

Die before I reach it

Part 3: The Jump 

Just as a wave crests before me, I jump

The seconds in the air are 
Unending, unbearable

When will gravity do its job

And force me down?

The splash beneath the water is 

More explosive than the one above

My fears have come true
I die with that dive

Part 4: The Death, The Birth

I no longer live, the water lives within me

My former self is pinned to ocean floor

Forever weighed down 
Beneath the dominion of the water

Submerged, I come alive 

With a gasp that sucks

In as much water as I can take

Then more

My lungs were meant to function 

Only for You

I belong to the water 

And its desire is for me

It's always been for me

Something new rises up within me

Infatuated with a passion

To share the endless, everlasting water

With those on the sand

Who build their castles in vain

And with those further away
In the valleys

Where they don't even know to 

Imagine water

Part 5: The Emergence 

I step out after a time of

Laughing, dancing, 
Floating, becoming

I can now leave the water 

Without the water leaving me

Consumed, I emerge 

Teardrops of water fall from my body

As I walk away from the ocean that
Slayed me and saved me 

As if lamenting the lost, they unceasingly drop 

Leaving an intoxicating fragrance in my wake

Multiplying with my motion

Part 6: Walking With Water 

To be continued 
Always 

SaveSaveSaveSaveSaveSaveSaveSaveSaveSaveSaveSaveSaveSave